Another One Left Today

Today I watched with envy another person get rolled out to the floor from the CCU. That means they are getting better. There are so many stories that end in victory coming from the CCU. Praise God!

Am I wrong to be envious? I am happy for the families and those who make it out. I just pray that God opens up heaven with an awesome miracle and allows my dad to be rolled out in a wheel chair to the floor.

Tonight dad was struggling for breathe and he looked up and said, "I don't think I'm gonna make it." That is hard to hear. My thirteen year old son was in there when he said it. Dad was really fighting it and just could not find any comfort. It must be a scary and hard thing to deal with. I know it is from our end of it. Brandon just said, "Dad, I think I'm gonna go out to the waiting room with mom." He then left. I know that was hard for him to hear, though he never said a word about it.

Thank you all for your prayers. I feel the presence of God in my life because of them. Ellen and I and our family love you all so very much!

Update on Dad

I'm sorry that I haven't blogged in a while. We have been spending our days and nights at the hospital with dad. I thought that you might like to see my dad to put a face with your prayers. For those who don't know, his name is Richard. This picture was taken in my office this past Thanksgiving.

He is still very serious. The doctors say that he is weakening. I know they are smart about many things. I too know that God is awesome. I just am at a point that I don't know how to pray. Of course I want dad to live, but not in the kind of suffering he is enduring now. I just want him to have some relief. I pray that God's will be done and for the grace to handle the outcome of all this. I know God is able and will provide grace because that is what He does.

I love my church family at Creekside. Tonight during our midweek meeting, they gathered around my family, laid hands on us, and prayed. Charles Frederick, one of our shepherds proclaimed a fast for those who wished to do so on Friday. He refuses to give up. He trusts the will of God, but has continued to pray for healing. What a shepherd! To any and all who read this from Creekside know this--you have been a solid rock for my family. I can't thank you enough.

To my blog family--you have been so patient with me while I share with you the hurt inside. Thanks Greg and Elaine for the phone call. You two are special to us. Thank all of you for your words of strength. How do people make it without family and love from friends?

Remember to please pray for my mom as well. She is exhausted!

House of Pain

Each day sitting in the hospital waiting room, I have witnessed a great equalizer---pain! It doesn't matter your style of dress or whether or not you wear a tattoo, or what name is on your church building! Pain is the same for everyone. Some people handle it differently. Some cry, some become angry, and some just sit in quietness. But no matter how it's handled, inside it is still painful.

Some of the stories end in victory, others in agony and still others in death. The staff rolls them in and out. People with heart problems, lung problems, car accidents, and the pain goes on and on.

Lots of things are interesting about watching all of these situations. Being in pain myself has added a "real" twist to it. I know that in ministry we strive to feel what others are going through and to a great degree we can. The word says, "Weep with those who weep" and because of close relationships, we can easily do that. But there is a different dynamic being a part of the crowd who is hurting--a crowd of people whom I do not know.

In one way, this situation makes it easier to minister. When people know that you are suffering, there is a sense of community that is unique. Not once when offering a prayer for these fellow "hurting" have any of them refused. It was received with tears and a wish back that my dad would do well. And in every case, comfort was felt and received. Tears subsided and empathy was felt. Sounds a lot like "bear one another's burdens" to me. In fact that is exactly what it is.

Sometimes I think that church becomes sterile to the whole concept of bearing burdens. One reason might be that we don't spend enough "everyday life" together. When we see one another outside a "church" environment, it is difficult to build the kind of relationships that naturally occur when we spend more time together. I think that church becomes something we "have" to do rather than something that is a natural everyday event.

God calls the church a "family." (Galatians 6:10 NCV) "When we have the opportunity to help anyone, we should do it. But we should give special attention to those who are in the family of believers." I pray that we will continue to be the kind of community of believers who reach out to one another and hold one another up in times of trouble and enjoy the love that we share in times free of pain. When people see us do this, they will know that we have been with Jesus and they too will begin to center their lives in Jesus!

I know in my case, I have received so much encouragement from my church family, blog family, and my own family. It is a wonderful feeling and one that others in the world need so badly.